The Work of God

     We had multizone conferences these last 2 days and have been really busy taking care of all the logistics. Elder Ochoa came to our mission to do a mission tour and to see how everything is going here in the Nicaragua south mission. I got a chance to sit in on one of the conferences and listen to what he had to tell us. He talked about faith. how we need to have faith in missionary work. One thing that really struck me was the importance in using faith to find those who have been chosen to receive the gospel at this time. We need to actively pray and seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost so that we can be led to the "chosen".

     Lately, the work has been struggling a little in my area and I know I need to start finding those chosen souls. He also showed me how we have great power and authority given by Jesus Christ himself. and we shouldn't have fear to do things that we know we can do through the power and authority. Living worthy of the guidance of the spirit is another thing and something I have a lot of trouble with. trying to be exactly obedient and trying to always keep my thoughts pure. I have found that as I focus my mind on the gospel and on the work that there is more power and authority in my speech and in my actions. 

     This next week we have the baptism of a lady named Anielka. She was a past investigator that received the missionary lessons one year ago but didn't get baptized for some reason, so, we have been teaching her for a couple weeks now and she is ready to be baptized. A lot of our investigators dropped this week including some families we had taught. I don't know what happened with them. we had one teaching and they were really awesome people they just couldn't come to church on Sunday. so we dropped them and I hope someday they will be more ready to receive the gospel and live by its laws. last Sunday, we didn't have anyone of our investigators come to church, I felt down and very depressed afterward. I prayed to my heavenly father with tears in my eyes and a heavy heart, why he had let me down, why couldn't I have the success I needed to have. 

     After pouring my angry and deceived heart to him, I heard a voice, a voice as clear as my own. the voice told me that this was not my work. This was not the work of Elder Lim, this was His work. He told me that as I felt sad, He felt even more sad. He chastened me for my prideful actions and thoughts. I am but a mere instrument in his hands through which He can work. My Heavenly Father knows me, He directs me and guides me, and knows what needs to be done. So, as I was trusting and confiding in my own strength, I became weak and the Lord did not pour out his blessings upon me. But, at the same time, I felt a great calm fall upon my mind and my heart. even though I felt like a failure of a missionary, I know that I am serving my God, and no one else. 

     He is the great master and teacher. This experience changed my heart. I didn't explain even the half of it because the feelings and words He spoke to me I cannot write, but, just know that the Lord knows, we will do His will because we love him. Seek not to do your own will, but to do the will of him that sent you. I believe we all have some kind of calling at every point in our lives. we must find that calling, that sentence, and give all glory to the Father, who has sent us.